Light of Life is the story of Jesus the Christ edited by L. Lovett, with illustrations by Lovett and Old Masters. The Four Gospels and Acts are arranged in order of events with exciting easy-to-read stories true to Scripture. Continuing scenes paint with
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Today's category: ScienceTest Tubes¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ We have two test tubes here," said the professor of IVF studies from Monash University. "They contain two carefully synthesised ingredients that we can now use to create human life. Solution A is a genitically engineered copy of all the ingredients in the female ovum, while Solution B replicates the active ingredients in male spermatozoa.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "If I mix them in this aseptic glass container a new human life will be conceived. Now any questions?"¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "Could you possibly give us a demonstration?" asked an awed member of the audience.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "I'm sorry, not tonight," said the professor, "Solution A has a headache."View hundreds more jokes online.Email this joke to a friend
Today's category: DrunksA Bad Day¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ A little guy is sitting at a bar, just looking at his drink for about a half-hour. A big trouble making truck driver comes up to him, takes the drink from the guy, and drinks it all down.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ The poor man starts crying. The truck driver says: "Come on man, I was just joking. Here, I'll buy you another drink. I just can't see a man crying."¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "No, it's not that. Today day is the worst of my life. First, I overslept and was late to an important meeting. My boss, outrageous, fired me.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ When I left the building to my car, I found out it was stolen. The police, they said they could do nothing. I got a cab to return home, and after I paid the cab driver and the cab had gone, I found that I left my wallet in the cab.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ I got home only to find my wife was with the gardener. I left home and came to this bar. When I was thinking about putting an end to my life, you show up and drink my poison ..."View hundreds more jokes online.Email this joke to a friend
Today's category: PilotsHave A Good Flight¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ This is Captain Sinclair speaking. On behalf of my crew I'd like to welcome you aboard British Airways flight 602 from New York to London. We are currently flying at a height of 35,000 feet midway across the Atlantic.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "If you look out of the windows on the starboard side of the aircraft, you will observe that both the starboard engines are on fire.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "If you look out of the windows on the port side, you will observe that the port wing has fallen off.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "If you look down towards the Atlantic ocean, you will see a little yellow life raft with three people in it waving at you.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "That's me your captain, the co-pilot, and one of the air stewardesses. This is a recorded message. Have a good flight!"View hundreds more jokes online.Email this joke to a friend
Today's category: SermonsA Joke Backfires¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ A preacher, who shall we say was "humor impaired," attended a conference to help encourage and better equip pastors for their ministry. Among the speakers were many well known and dynamic speakers.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ One such boldly approached the pulpit and, gathering the entire crowd's attention, said, "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman that wasn't my wife!" The crowd was shocked! He followed up by saying, "And that woman was my mother!" - The crowd burst into laughter and delivered the rest of his talk, which went over quite well.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ The next week, the pastor decided he'd give this humor thing a try, and use that joke in his sermon. As he surely approached the pulpit that sunny Sunday, he tried to rehearse the joke in his head. It suddenly seemed a bit foggy to him.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ Getting to the microphone he said loudly, "The greatest years of my life were spent in the arms of another woman that was not my wife!" The congregation inhaled half the air in the room. After standing there for almost 10 seconds in the stunned silence, trying to recall the second half of the joke, the pastor finally blurted out, "...and I can't remember who she was!"View hundreds more jokes online.Email this joke to a friend
I have been crucified with Christ; it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me‚Ä¶ ‚ÄĒGalatians 2:20These words mean the breaking and collapse of my independence brought about by my own hands, and the surrendering of my life to the supremacy of the Lord Jesus. No one can do this for me, I must do it myself. God may bring me up to this point three‚Ä¶