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Today's category: FaithDivine Advice¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ A businessman was in a great deal of trouble. His business was failing, he had put everything he had into the business, he owed everybody it was so bad he was even contemplating suicide. As a last resort he went to a pastor and poured out his story of tears and woe.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ When he had finished, the pastor said, "Here's what I want you to do, put a beach chair and your Bible in your car and drive down to the beach. Take the beach chair and the Bible to the water's edge, sit down in the beach chair, and put the Bible in your lap. Open the Bible; the wind will rifle the pages, but finally the open Bible will come to rest on a page. Look down at the page and read the first thing you see. That will be your answer, that will tell you what to do."¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ A year later the businessman went back to the pastor and brought his wife and children with him. The man was in a new custom- tailored suit, his wife in a mink coat, the children shining. The businessman pulled an envelope stuffed with money out of his pocket and gave it to the pastor as a donation in thanks for his advice.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ The pastor recognized the benefactor, and was curious. "You did as I suggested?" he asked.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "Absolutely," replied the businessman.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "You went to the beach?"¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "Absolutely."¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "You sat in a beach chair with the Bible in your lap?"¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "Absolutely."¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "You let the pages rifle until they stopped?"¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "Absolutely."¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "And what were the first words you saw?"¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "Chapter 11."View hundreds more jokes online.Email this joke to a friend
Today's category: ChurchFaithful With Much¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ At a Wednesday evening church meeting a very wealthy man rose to give his testimony.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "I'm a millionaire," he said, "and I attribute it all to the rich blessings of God in my life. I can still remember the turning point in my faith, like it was yesterday:¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ I had just earned my first dollar and I went to a church meeting that night. The speaker was a missionary who told about his work. I knew that I only had a dollar bill and had to either give it all to God's work or nothing at all. So at that moment I decided to give my whole dollar to God. I believe that God blessed that decision, and that is why I am a rich man today."¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ As he finished it was clear that everyone had been moved by this man's story. But, as he took his seat, a little old lady sitting in the same pew leaned over and said: "Wonderful story! I dare you to do it again!"View hundreds more jokes online.Email this joke to a friend
Today's category: MiscellaneousNun In A Cab¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ A nun gets into a cab and the cab driver won't stop staring at her. She asks him why is he staring and he replies, "I have a question to ask you but I don't want to offend you."¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ She answers, "My dear son, you cannot offend me. When you're as old as I am and have been a nun as long as I have, you get a chance and see and hear just about everything. I'm sure that there's nothing you could say or ask that I would find offensive."¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "Well, I've always had a fantasy to have a nun kiss me."¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ She responds, "Well, let's see what we can do about that:¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ 1) you have to be single and¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ 2) you must be Catholic."¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ The cab driver is very excited and says, "Yes, I am single and I'm Catholic too!"¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ The nun says, "O.K., pull into the next alley."¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ He does and the nun kisses him. But when they get back on the road, the cab driver starts crying his eyes out. "My dear child, why are you crying?"¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ "Forgive me sister, but I have sinned. I lied, I must confess, I'm married and I'm Jewish."¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ The nun says, "That's OK, my name is Kevin and I'm on my way to a Halloween Party."View hundreds more jokes online.Email this joke to a friend
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