Today's category: ChurchYou Never Hear in Church¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ Hey! It's MY turn to sit on the front pew!¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ I was so enthralled, I never noticed your sermon went over time 25 minutes.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ Personally, I find witnessing much more enjoyable than golf.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ I've decided to give our church the $500.00 a month I used to send to TV evangelists.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ I volunteer to be the permanent teacher for the Junior High Sunday School class.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ Forget the denominational minimum salary: let's pay our pastor so s/he can live like we do.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ I love it when we sing hymns I've never heard before!¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ Since we're all here, let's start the worship service early!¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ Pastor, we'd like to send you to this Bible seminar in the Bahamas.¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ ¬ Nothing inspires me and strengthens my commitment like our annual stewardship campaign!View hundreds more jokes online.Email this joke to a friend
UK to pay steep price if Brexit falls through
DURING his spectacular rise from London beancounter to the globe-trotting boss of WPP, the advertising powerhouse he created out of a backstreet wire-basket and trolley company, Sir Martin Sorrell was rarely sentimental. The man who helped turn a ramshackle but chic industry into a global force poached accounts mercilessly and often pitted his own firms against each other in the quest for clients.Not for nothing did the late David Ogilvy, one of the industry's founding patriarchs, reputedly describe him as an ‚Äúodious little shit‚ÄĚ when WPP came after the Ogilvy Group in the late 1980s at the dawn of its decades-long acquisition spree (see chart). But Ogilvy later became WPP's non-executive chairman, and the company turned into the world's largest marketing conglomerate with more than $20bn in annual revenues. In business, Sir Martin charmed as well as cajoled.
NASHVILLE, Tenn. - Family Research Council President Tony Perkins this morning addressed the National Religious Broadcaster's 75th annual convention on the importance of evangelicals continuing to engage our culture to promote faith, family, freedom in the public square....
BONDS, shares and Treasury bills are all very well, but in the end they are just pieces of paper. They are not assets you can hang on the wall or display to admiring neighbours. Many rich people like to invest their wealth in more tangible form; property, of course, but also collectibles such as art, fine wine and classic cars.Is that wise? Elroy Dimson, Paul Marsh and Mike Staunton of the London Business School (LBS) have run the numbers for their annual analysis of the financial markets in the Credit Suisse global investment-returns yearbook. Some of these assets have done rather better than others (see chart). Fine wine delivered the best returns; surprising to cynics who might assume that, in the long run, the value of wine vanishes as it turns into vinegar. Really old wine often has historical resonance. A bottle of Chateau Lafite Rothschild from 1787 was sold for $156,450 in 1985 because it was thought to belong to Thomas Jefferson.Estimating the returns from these assets, after...Continue reading